Cash Cow

earlier today...

lady: last years raffle was really successful. we should do it again to raise funds for the school.
me: what are you raffling?
lady: we usually get people in the community and businesses to donate things.
man in the back of the room: i can donate a cow.
me: (laughs loudly) (no one else laughs)
lady: are you going to offer to slaughter it?
lady in the back of the room: i can donate 20 chickens, but they got to pluck 'em.
me: (realises this is for real...) i can, um, donate a ... gift card.
man in the back of the room: where are you from?
me: new orleans. i don't like grass. (still not sure why i threw that in.)
man in the back of the room: i could tell you weren't from here.
me: i don't even like cows.

if you are a personal friend and i ask you to buy a raffle ticket, please don't say no. i swear, the man said you can sell the cow.

ENJOY.


MUSIC ;-)
PHOENIX
check out if i ever feel better. i'm really liking too young also. i ran to this entire CD today. made for a great run. one thing i noticed when i listened to it in it's entirety, is that i couldn't really peg down a genre for them. they have bit of everything, and i think anyone could find a song they love.
official site, video





CANDY FLOSS
JESSICA ALBA
five things i learned about jessica alba in less than five minutes.
1. stars in Good Luck Chuck, with Dane Cook. opening this weekend.
2. we have 3 things in common: we're both 5'6", we both finished highschool at 16 and we both had asthma as a child.
3. lived in biloxi, mississippi, as a child.
4. wanted to be an actress since she was 5.
5. she threatened to sue Playboy magazine for putting her picture on the cover. she felt it implied she posed nude for the magazine, which she did not. number of jessica alba's that were got hugh hefner to apologise? 1. number of men who would like hugh to apologise for teasing them with the cover? about 8 kabillion trillion.



DESTINATION: Cinderella's Castle
in about 5 weeks i'll be taking a picture in front of Cinderelly's House. i'm STILL in the mood for lists, so here's my list of coolio things about cindy's house:
1. Walt Disney was inspired by the Neuschwanstein Castle in Germany.
2. it was toilet papered as a prank by Stitch, of Lilo and Stitch. (for reals.)
3. originally intended as an apartment for Walt and his family, there is an area in the castle used now as a 'suite' that you can win. Disney officials randomly select guests in the park for this treat.
4. Cinderella's Royal Table, the restaurant in the castle, starts taking reservations 180 days in advance... and it's usually booked solid within the first day reservations open.
5. because it is in Florida, the castle was built to withstand up to 110 mph winds from hurricanes.


CHECKITOUT.COM
http://www.rinkworks.com/namegen/
homework time! go to the page, look at the spot that says 'FUN NAMES', scroll through until you find 'mushy insults'. now click 'generate'. post your favorite in the comments section. mine is "meatcutie". (dibs)

http://www.grupthink.com/topic/4576/Strangest_Music_Videos_Of_All_Time
strangest music videos of all time. enjoy and don't forget to vote.

http://listverse.com/science/10-easy-arithmetic-tricks/
i'm loving this. i already knew some of these, but some were new to me. i like math, did you know that? yes, of course you did, you little meatcutie!


GADGETS and STUFFS
WOOFER
it's a WOOFER, get it?











BEAUTY
i'm excited about this, GRAY is the neutral for this fall and winter. so yay, i have lots of gray so i don't have to buy anything. except that i will. a lot.

and, SHHHHH!, i've got a secret. you know those gradual self-tanners? they are pretty much self-tanner blended with regular lotion. ok. i mix THAT with equal parts lotion, and that's what i use as a body lotion after i shower. because i'm sooo pale, even gradual tanners make me look really tan in a couple of days. but, by diluting it in regualar lotion even more, i don't look tan in the least. i DO have a very slight glow. and that's all i need.



WISE WORDS
"I love to go to the schoolyard and watch the children jump and scream, but they don't know I'm using blanks."
Jack Handy, SNL

"You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, 'Why not?'"
George Bernard Shaw

"Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts."
aristotle


Enjoy your week and the Weather! Yay Fall! (or spring if you are in the southern hemisphere...representing!)